justrandomexpressions

 It was all so different ... you know , just different ... The first time our eyes glazed at each other , and gleamed , The first time her teal orange hair felt on my skin . Her smile  ,or the way she hid that smile . Her laugh , when I acted silly at times or at my dumb jokes ... It was ... just different ! Ours seemed to be a fairytale , So magical , so pink and blue ! And we know it was special , All its silhouettes and hue ! I smile , when I think of her ,  She cries , when she thinks of me , And we laugh , when together we are ! Just so different ! Feels like a dream , so untrue  Like a sky red and blue ! Will it last forever ? I ask myself , Or is it gonna end sometime soon ! Ours was a string ,  Delicate  Ours was a bond ,  Never to break ! Ours was a love ,  So strong , Ours was a world , Never wrong , Because 'us' were different , Unlike all stars , which twinkle , All clouds , that whisper , Ours is a night ... Just different !!

 Have you ever been very close to something Or someone ? As if you're just about to reach to it , to touch it , and to embrace it , You can feel it's breath , it's aura , the satisfying aroma . You can feel your hair exciting , skin getting goosebumps . You're all set to achieve it ,  and everything that is in it . You are confident , And you have that canny style . You feel like you're the king of the jungle , and the master of everyone's arses , And just then ... When everything is just so close ... It all comes to a standstill . The last leg of the plan slips , And the toe that just had an inch left  to move , breaks , All the things you felt so close to you , Seem to go farther and farther away , Your grip starts loosening , You starve to get everything , You yell , you shout , you cry  You can't let that slip away , That something ,  Something so close , It's like a bullet slicing through your soul . And you can't stand it , Just can't . But...

 I keep asking myself , What am I doing ? Am I living up to my expectations ? Or the ones that other people have from me? Am I worthy enough ? To be deserving what I'm getting ? Am I upholding the name of the institution that I belong to ? I keep asking myself , What am I doing ? And each time I try to answer this question , I look back at my path , I see myself with a purpose , A purpose and an aim , An aim and some fire within , And then I see myself , And it all becomes foggy , Confused , lost , I look out for help , But then I realise , that finally it's gonna be me , who's gonna help myself . And then I keep asking myself , What am I doing ? Where do I start ? Or where do I resume from ? Where do I find my way back ? It's so hard to tell sometimes , But I'm sure that wherever I go , Whatever I do , in the end , I'm gonna find my way back . Because whatever I do , I never forget my roots , I never have wrong in my head , I never have bad in my blood . And th...

 ऊंची उड़ान भरक आया वो और भी ऊंचा उड़ना चाहता था। इस अंधेरे जंगल में वो बेताब परिंदा  मशाल बनना चाहता था । मगर इतना आसान नहीं होने वाला था  उसका सफर , शुरुआत में ही कोहरा था । और इस धुंध में वो बेचैन परिंदा  मायूसी से घबराया था । क्यूं था वो पल इतना शांत , इतना अजीब  और क्यूं था मेरा मन इतना मायूस , इतना गरीब । अभी तो मैंने बस शुरुआत की है  क्या मै उस काबिल नहीं , या गुनाह है मेरा , देखना वो ऊंचे सपने जिन तक सीढ़ी नहीं । मगर मैं भी एक परिंदा हूं , खुदा का फरिश्ता हूं । मायूस हूं तो क्या हुआ , जनाब ऊंचाई से नहीं डरता हूं । बादल तो आएंगे , बारिश भी आएगी  तूफान भी आएंगे , और आंधी भी आएगी । फांसी लगानी है तो लगा दो , जनाब लेकिन मेरे हौंसले में तकरार नहीं आएगी । समय समय की बात है  आज पेड़ों में छुपा हूं तो क्या हुआ । कल जब खुले आसमान को देखोगे , तो देखोगे मुझे , हवाओं में पंख लहराता , वही मायूस परिंदा ।।

Life is unpredictable. Sometimes , it gives you opportunities , To stand on top of the world and feel high . But sometimes , it snatches everything you sowed , JLT... And watching it , through an alien's eye , It looks just like another fun game , Something like the pinball , Where you keep juggling and struggling ,  Hitting different pieces , And eventually falling into the pit !! But , the best thing about it is , That you start again , afresh , Towards making another glorious journey  In this crazy life !! I've seen people , thousands of them ,  Falling the same way And the irony is , The higher you climb , The deeper you fall . And equally likely ,  The more you get injured ! The more your hopes shatter !! But being at such a level , Certainly brings out some capacity to stand up again !! Or to be more precise , bounce !! And not bounce back , but bounce forward !! With even more energy and expertise . And this is the best thing about it all !! We've all experien...

Darkness came from nowhere And so came the drowsiness And in a bit of frenzy My eyes snapped shut... A complete moment of silence and nothingness prevailed  And the very next moment , I was thrust-pushed into a world anew , untouched ,  Or so it seemed... A world where there was no day , and no night , A world where all there was , were a sky , so beautiful ,  Nobody could find a flaw in its perfections , Covered in a tint of violet and pink... No birds , no creatures  All it had were dark , dull streets , as empty as it could be Leading to a vast clear stretch of the most levelled grass one could've ever seen... I walked and walked I fancied reaching the end I walked faster and then ran... I had no thoughts , no emotions whatsoever , I was just running not knowing to end where... And that was when I saw dark souls , souls like me , running Running to noone knew where , And I caught hold of two and followed... After an endless run , we made it to a town , a town unus...

I was heavy , Work stress and a busy urban life you see ,  And to lighten up a bit And freshen up a little Nothing is better than a  visit to the countryside... And here I was , Amongst the tall chir trees , The trails fading away And withering , Brown needle-like leaves , Heaps of them , And the smooth grounds Painted in a chrome of lavish green... The blue sky far above , And bright white specks of clouds ,  Sunlight filtering through canopies , A landscape so beautiful  And not a flaw... Unending slopes on my left , With thousand and thousands of trees , All kinds of birds and insects chirping , And a music that made me free... The fierce , strong flow of water  Could be heard somewhere down on my right , An emanating sweet smell of it , Made me go dancing... On my front , an untrodden  trail appealed to me , To wander further and further , And discover all of it... And I moved along the unknown , Leaving behind an old me... I learnt the song of nature...

You may not know  Or maybe you do How much I love you Or care about you Or miss you... I want to hold your hands And look into your eyes And drown in them I want to hug you  And cuddle you And lose myself in your hair... I want to sit with you And look up to the stars  And pick one for you I want to travel with you To every inch of the world  And give you my heart... I want to hold you tightly When the storm comes And never leave you again I want to wet your lips Keep your scent  Feel your breath And become one... I want to stay with you forever And walk to the end of the world Just to smile at death And do it all over and over again...

There seems to be an irony with the title itself , Coz so much goes on in my mind , Which is full of ideas ,  And clues , yes , Yet is clueless... People think I'm a freak Because I express too much , Which is quite unusual ,  Different and maybe  Hurts the sentiments of others , Coz new , out-of-the-box ideas  Were never welcomed at the first place... And this sometimes makes me sad , sometimes makes me feel pity... And this makes me feel down , low , and finally , unexpressive... Now , people call it depression , But I don't think it is... Coz my mind is just messed up , Messed up and tired of being forced to organize... It has so much to say , only If someone has the patience to listen , Listen and not just hear... And you know what ,  I just end up smiling , Smiling , coz my mind is clueless  Clueless , as to what to say , What to express... Some call it overthinking And some even feel sorry for me , But I don't really understand , Coz it's just a cluel...

Never thought this would really happen one day... Never saw it coming , to be honest For , they say , love makes you blind Yet , couldn't believe he would betray... Always thought he loved me And I loved him more... He trusted me And I trusted him more... But he would betray me Couldn't stand it any more... Was our love not enough ?? Or did I do something wrong !!! Was he the one who cheated ?? Or did I not love him more !!! Why was I the one who was hurt , And not him !! Why was I the one who shed tears , And not him !! Why was I the one who couldn't move on , And not him !! Why was I the one who cared , And not him !! Is this the price we need to pay ?? To love someone immensely... Is this the reward we get back ?? To love someone profoundly... Neither could I forget it Nor could I understand why... He left me alone Without even saying good-bye... Will he come back one day And will everything become normal again ?? Or will I still soak myself in tears  Never to trust anyo...

My life was superb... The charming princess , My friends used to call me... But it seemed my fate  Didn't want me to be happy  For , a dark night came To snatch it away from me , Unfortunately... The life of the parties , that I was And called to one , that night , as always... Wrong time , wrong place , I guess... It was the most dreadful night , in all ways... While returning home ,  I chose to walk And not with my friends as usual Had no idea whatsoever  What was going to happen thereafter... There were four of them  Behind the bushes , All drunk up , And I paced my steps  For I knew , it was not safe  Then , I heard some hushes , And............................. I shouted , I cried , But nothing seemed to help With all my might  I could only say  " PLEASE DON'T " But these devils , They had no souls... For the rest of my life ,  I lost my smile  And lived with the fear of these ghouls... And I am not the only one  Millions ...

O' mountain , I saw you from far away... And you looked pretty great Like a huge beast standing proud With deodar and chir trees  Being your hair... I couldn't take my eyes off you A green-brown look  And shades of grey... And as I came towards you You seemed to go farther and farther away... But I was dedicated , you see With compassion , I touched your feet... And like a father you blessed me  And cheered me up  To achieve another feat... I was so excited , I climbed up to your crown... And what I saw was , So many people like me  Watching me up from down... And then I realized this , You cannot move a mountain . But you climb that mountain , And you can move the world , Becoming yourself a fountain...

Let's come to the biggest unanswered question of all times... " What is God ?? " Whether God created humans or humans created God ? Is it just one or are there 33 crores of them as they say ? Does God really exist or is it just an idea ? Well , neither do I have a solid answer to this question nor can I vouch for your satisfaction with my explanation... But , for me ,  My Mother is my God... They say God created humans , God created life... For me , my mother bore me and gave me the ticket to live... For me , my Mother is my God... They say God takes care of you and selflessly loves you... For me , my mother cares for  me irrespective of what and always showers me with unconditional , selfless love... For me , my Mother is my God... They say , the one who comes to your mind when in trouble , is God... For me , whenever I am in trouble , the first word that comes into my mind is ' Maa '... For me , my Mother is my God... They say God exists nowhere yet everywhere a...

In Hindu mythology , we get to know about both Suryavanshi kings , who stood by ideals and principles like Ram  And the Chandravanshi kings , who were emotionally driven like Krishna... But the question arises , that ,  In today's modern societal make-up , What to follow , " Principles or Emotions " In fact , this can be a matter of great debate but let us try to discuss this on a much lighter and pragmatic note . In our growing years , all of us want to achieve , to do great and to excel at whatever field we choose in our lives... And for that , We set up ideals , principles , timetables , all in order to discipline ourselves to achieve something that we want to , And it's great to do that . They make good leaders But sometimes , circumstances occur where odds favour against us , And at this point , we become confused what to do !! Remember , Sita followed her principles and made a tough decision to step out of Lakshman Rekha at her own risk to feed Ravana disguised ...

Sitting on my roof  I looked up at you Amazed at your pure , infinite stretch of blue Specks of white clouds giving you a veteran look And a bright morning sun  tanning my pretty look How peaceful are you  O' mighty sky Not a single frown  In your cool calm face You give me a reason to live with joy and without any stress Even in this tremendously competitive life race...

 ये उस मुसाफ़िर की दास्तां है जो ज़िंदगी के सफ़र में कुछ गुम सा गया है कुछ थम सा गया है । मां की कोख से निकला था  ये सफ़र शुरू करने के लिए  मगर उन नन्हें पैरों के लिए ये मैदान बहुत बड़ा था । बचपन तो बहुत हसीन था मगर ये मौसम अब कुछ  गुमनुमा सा हो गया है । रास्ते तो बहुत थे तब मगर मंज़िल नहीं थी आज मंज़िल जब मिल गई तो ये रास्ते कहीं खो गए । तब बाहें तो बहुत थी समेटने के लिए  मगर इरादे बुनियादी नहीं थे आज इरादे मजबूत हैं मगर ये बाहें कहीं खो गईं । इस अंधेरे से ना डर  ए मुसाफिर , तेरा खुदा तेरे साथ है । तू बस सामने चलता चल ये जहां भी तेरे सामने परास्त है ।।

Life seems no more interesting to me now  And therefore I'm forced to write this note... And choose this path... I chose this path not because I had no reason to live... But because I had no means to survive... I chose this path not because I did not want to live ,  To soar , To be happy , Or to achieve my dreams... But because , I couldn't do all of this now... Because , life had become too harsh on me... My business failed , Relationship broke , Rejected by any job I applied for , Friends went away , Lost my parents , Unpaid loans tortured me , I was broke , Disappointed , And I was left with my small siblings to take care of... I chose this path not because I had lost hope... But because of the hope that maybe afterlife would be better... I chose this path not because I didn't care about those I left behind... But because I didn't want them to suffer anymore coz of me... I'm sorry !! Bye life !!! . . . ( 6 yrs later ) A BMW parked in the facade of my big farmhous...

While writing in my notebook today , I realised what power the notebook really has... These some sheets of paper organised together , Have been the ever companion of our humankind... The greatest love stories were written in the notebook , And humanity's greatest inventions were born in the notebook , The most creative ideas came through the notebook , And dark secrets of civilizations preserved in the notebook , History found its way to us through the notebook , And people made themselves eternal through the notebook... My love letters were written in the notebook , And my emotions in the torn pages of the notebook , It stored my scent , my tears , my blood ,  the notebook , It stored my unsaid words ,  the notebook... Sometimes it lived , Sometimes it burnt ,  the notebook  Secured the past , And changed the present ,  the notebook Fuelled revolutions ,  Established treaties ,  the notebook  Divided nations , United people ,  the notebook S...

All big nations and states have fences , These fences define the boundaries , Which give them a definite shape And distinguishes one from another . Unfortunately , These fences have always been a matter of conflict , History has been the witness to this fact . But what I have realised lately , Is that these fences also exist and apply true to individual level too... With this , I don't refer to our skin or our bodily limits , But our own personal space . Some people possess rigid fences and small personal spaces , We term them introverts . Some have large spaces and semi-permeable fences , These are the ambiverts . And for some , these fences don't exist at all . ( Even this is not ideal , as these people are most likely to be subjugated , a nation without fences is no nation at all . A fence is necessary to define oneself otherwise one would diffuse into nothingness .) Now as I said before , these fences are cursed to cause conflicts . Similarly , if we intrude another's f...

What is it to be a loner?? Well ... It all started when I was seven , Watching violence at my home ,  I grew constraints ... A drunk father beating up a naive mother ,  And , I , locked up away in a small room all day No siblings to rest a shoulder on ,  A crying mother , the only face to watch ,  I grew constraints ... Constraints to talk to people ,  To trust them  Bullied by friends at school , (Wait , not friends , the only friend I had was my diary) And secluded by all Sitting alone in a corner desk in class , Having noone to share my tiffin with , All day , immersed in my own world thinking ,  And overthinking ,  And then being restless all night long . This is how I grew up ,  Developing mental constraints , Which I never realized might become psychological disorders lasting for life . But being a loner , Is it such an unwanted life?? Is solitude , the only characteristic of a loner? Well ... With time I realized ,  Absolutely no ...

We all have wondered all our lives and are all confused ... What do we mean by peace?? Is it watching the same old movie again and again with your family and still enjoying those boring dialogues? Or is it just being able to watch anything of your choice without any restriction? Is it being immersed in relationships and staying true to them? Or is it just being free , away from all kinds of relationships? Is it being affable and facing what life throws at us? Or is it just running away from life to find a place alone? What do we mean by peace? Is it doing your job meticulously and fulfilling all family responsibilities? Or is it just travelling the world with no sense of responsibility at all? Is it doing meditation in your balcony amidst all kinds of noises? Or is it going to the Himalayas and then meditating in the lap of nature? Is it about watching the high snow-capped peaks from my window and feel high? Or is it about conquering them all and then feeling high? What do we mean by p...

When I was a kid , My parents told me about it , My teachers taught me about it , I even read about it in the books . It said life was a cycle . We all are born We thrive to an apex And then apocalypse comes And everything gets destroyed to ash . There were stories of Noah , who saved each being of every species And re-started this world . By the time I was 9 ,  I saw this movie 2012 . And I was terrified at the very thought of the world ending . But as 2012 passed peacefully I realized it was all a taradiddle . The world's not gonna end so soon . After all , we are the smartest beings Who've ever inhabited the planet We have the best of the technology and medical facilities . And then came 2020 , The bushfires , refugee crisis , gas leak , cyclone , dam breach came And came the PANDEMIC . Even the best of the scientists and the doctors and the technology couldn't build a reliable vaccine . And save the people from dying . This was not it . Economies fell , Nations strived ...

" Can't we be just friends , please !! " Whaatt!!!! And my whole world crashed... My dreams shattered... My emotions started playing games with me... Confusion , rage , anger , anxiety , depression , sadness I was getting it all !! Whyy??? Was she not ready or was she afraid to fall in love? Was it me or was it someone else? Was it her insecurities or was it the immaturity of our love? I just couldn't digest it at all . Our distances grew... We contacted less... And slowly and gradually ,  I was back to square one . And then this thing struck my mind... Back to square one ... Why not start it all again?? And then I started it all again... But this time with a change... This time , I was not falling in love with her ,  I was understanding her Building trust , hope and joy We were friends , of course , but a lot more than that ... We motivated each other ,  We removed each other's insecurities We became each other's fall back options We became each other's c...

It all started with a game , " You played really well ". " Oh ! Thanks ". Since I had nothing to do that day  I went to spectate a basketball match of college girls with my friend . I went there just to kill my time and had no interest in the match at all . Until ,  until I saw HER , The way she jumped with the ball and threw it for a 3-pointer , The way she cheered up her team and won the match with a bang . The details of her face and her perfect athletic figure , I couldn't  stop myself staring at her , her voice ,  God , I couldn't help myself falling for such a perfect girl . The very day , I stalked her friends' accounts and slid into her DMs . " Hey , are you up for a coffee tommorow?" " Ya sure " And then , it just went on and on... We came really close ... The whole college was full of gossips about the college dreamgirl's relationship with me  I was on cloud nine . I realized she was the one . My excitement knew no bound...

Being a single parent is difficult sometimes , But cherishing the memories of  'our togetherness'  is what keeps me alive these days ... These 10 years have seemed to me no less than a thousand years without her , who was now lost ,  lost among the stars , me n' my daughter would gaze all night long ... Well , it was a very special day today , I was driving my daughter to her first date ... Since , it was an hour long drive to the Times Càfe , Shimla . My daughter mustered up the courage to ask me about my first date with her mom . " Papa , please tell na , how did you know she was the ONE and what happened that night , please , papa , please ." " Well , beta , those were the days when there was no social media , no phones , it was only letters ... Letters , that we used to write with compassion and fill them with loads of love and emotions ... It were summers , 20 years ago ... Your mother and I had been exchanging letters for a month now ,  You know , she w...

When Modiji insisted on " Aatm-nirbharta " to our nation With too enthusiasm , I rose to the occasion , But in the process of becoming one - I just realised the characteristics of - " self-dependency "  Of which I had none  Well , even for a glass of water , I need my mom . To better my mood , I watch a rom-com . To wake up in the morning , I set an alarm . When feeling cold ,  I need a hug to warm . To please my li'l sister , I become some cartoon . To describe you my love  I use the stars and the moon . Neither am I an autotroph , Nor am I the sun . To fulfill my nutritional requirement , I need a penny and a bun . We have become dependent on others so much , That we've lost our individuality , It's not a big concern , my friends Just a bitter bizarre reality ...

Today , I lost a tear... Usually , I never used to cry But , that day was no usual day For , she left me Left me , when I needed her the most . No calls , no texts , no replies I felt as if I were stranded in a different world . Even that tear seemed to laugh at me And this hit me hard . My tear told me to wake up ,  I woke up . My tear told me to stand up , I stood up . My tear told me to forget everything , I forgot everything . My tear told me to work out , I worked out . My tear told me to study hard , I studied hard . My tear told me to prepare well , And I prepared well . My tear told me to just do it , And I did it . My tear became my constant companion ...  And one day , when I was in the pinnacle of my success ,  It just disappeared ...  A text popped up in my screen -  It was her , " Hey !! Congratulations !!! I heard you got recommended !! Can we talk ?? I'm really sorry !!😞 "  "Huh !!" , And I smiled 😏 Today , I lost a tear...  But I thin...